Near Miss

There was a crucial moment when Nick Clegg was missing from the political radar, but when he popped up at the debates, the political police, the FBI of policy, nabbed him, and suddenly he just wasn't Mr Popular.

Weeks of scrutiny are putting Clegg's Liberal Democrats back where they belong, in a vaguely relevant position.

With this election too close to call, Labour and the Conservatives are playing the roles of big banker and small business. Dave 'The Banker' Cameron, pretends to be offering the best deal on the High Street, but really, it's only for those with big fat wallets. Gordon 'I'm not sure I agree with Nick anymore' Brown, is the MD of a business which did well in the good times, but just can't catch a break when the squeeze is squeezing.

Dave pretends he really, really understands the plight of the British people, and feels a little sorry they didn't get bailed out, like him, in life's fiscal lottery. Gordon 'gets it', though what every MD will tell you; when your back's against the wall, telling consumers their service levels will improve next year just doesn't cut it.

Gordon has turned a profit into a loss. Dave has one lesson left to lend to Gordon - what every big bank will tell you - some businesses are too big to fail. Labour may be politically insolvent, but they are still in the game, and with a little luck, a little pleading, and stone cold plausability, they may yet win the largest number of seats. If not, Cameron will call in the nation's overdraft, and we will feel a squeeze that will make many squeal.